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Beautiful post Emma. I love how you write about grief in such an inclusive way. My biggest grief has been for something I never even had - children. It's invisible to the outside world and therefore easy to find yourself minimising it too, but I've learned that grief needs to be felt (and shared) for healing to occur ❤️

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Oh Vicki - yes that is exactly it - the need to grieve those losses whatever they may be. That is such a fundamental one to process - the loss of that which was yearned for but didn't happen, and like you say, invisible to the outside world. I thought a lot about miscarriages when I was writing the article as well, also various hidden disabilities. Things that whilst not stretching society's tolerance, are things that we hold inside. Grief cannot be contained in this way, and indeed needs to be felt and shared. I hope that you have managed to get this opportunity to feel yours. It is so real. Much love xxx

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Thanks Emma. Yes finding other people on a similar path to share it with - the ones who 'get it' - has been key

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❤️

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So incredible to read about your process here Emma. What beautiful and important work you have been called to do. When I said goodbye to my Grandad for the last time I cried myself from the train platform to home to the sofa to sleep and when I woke up in the dark I drove to the sea to watch the sun come up so I could see something bigger than my grief. It was everything I needed and I’m still trying to find a way to share it as medicine with others. Much love to you. ✨ 🌊

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Oh Claire that is such a beautiful and heartbreaking image. I’m so sorry for your loss. I think that’s why the pull to nature and the open water has got me through so much. It’s exactly what you say - somehow immersing in something bigger than grief. I love how you mention a ‘calling’ because that’s how it’s really starting to feel. Not a ‘job’ but a far deeper purpose, which I also very much sense from you 💕

Thank you 🙏 and much love to you too x

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I love how you emphasize that there is no hierarchy when it comes to Grief. This feels so important to identify and clarify, to allow people to BE in the depth of whatever loss they are walking with as that is the only way to fully alchemize the shapeshifting that occurs and the only way that there is an invitation to honor the medicine ALIVE in the relationship WITH the life and death of that reality.

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I think we always feel that we must compare our circumstances with others, be that the depth of our grief or any number of emotions, and we limit kindness to ourselves by doing this. I love your phrase above 'allow people to be in the depth of whatever loss they are walking with'. That is exactly it. Thank you for your kind words 🙏

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A beautiful essay, thank you. Grieving the loss of a life not lived after a change in health status is a weird one because I’m still here but I’m not the same, but I’m not so very different either.

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