Friday Dip - now that's what I call a gift...
Thoughts to wash over you for the weekend
The gift that made my week
I unexpectedly received something this week that made me so overjoyed, surprised and laugh out loud happy, it really made me reflect on what makes a good gift for a loved one.
So what was it?!? Well, my mum had excitedly told me a few days before that she’d bought me something. I’m not gonna lie, that makes me slightly nervous as she is as random as she is generous. She arrived and asked me to help her lift a box out of the car - intriguing. My instinct was that it would be wine, but it didn’t have the right weight. No giveaway markings on the box...
We brought it round into the kitchen where I gleefully attacked the packaging with a scissors...to be greeted with this:
A HENRY!!!!!
Why so good?
Because I felt heard. She had really listened to me bleating on about my rubbish ‘Shark’ vacuum cleaner that gets blocked every five minutes, which I bought to replace my even worse ‘style over substance Dyson’ having reluctantly consigned my old Henry to the junk pile many years before. She knew it would not be something I’d buy myself, as in these times of high living costs, with my mammoth salary of er... practically nothing as a writer, being supported by my fire-fighter husband, I couldn’t possibly justify buying a new hoover when we already had one. But oh, I had missed Henry so. I missed his ease, how he felt in my hands, his light strength and unsurpassed suction... I think I’ll leave it there before it turns into a soft porn script...except to say it turns out he can still make short work of my dress like no other.
What’s the feeling?
It made me feel loved and thought about, and gave me that warm fuzzy feeling that my sister and I always called ‘crisp bag’ - reminiscent of that hint of first love where your insides crinkle like an empty packet of Walkers. She wanted to make my life easier, to gift me something I would not buy myself, and by doing so, eased a small yet strangely significant load. I thought back to other gifts that have made me feel like that - the engraved necklace from my best friend that I wear every day, the special edition Quality Street tin of solely strawberry cremes sent to me on my birthday, the candle my husband sent me which deserves (and will get) a whole article in itself, the cards written by my children, and then there are the rings - but perhaps not the obvious ones.
The unexpected Christmas gift
A few years after our brother died, my sister, Brenda, and I (inspired by dear friends who also lost their brother) commissioned a ‘sibling ring’. Our birthstones set alongside a each other in a ring - a diamond in the middle on the year he would have been fifty, our own stones on either side, and our initials engraved inside. Brenda found a jeweller, and as he set about creating it, we were informed it would be a few months until completion, definitely not before February the following year so I put it to the back of my mind.
Brenda and I had agreed not to get each other Christmas presents as we would buy the rings instead, however on Christmas day she approached me with a little bag. Awks. I had taken us at our word and bought her feck all. I opened the bag, and inside was a little box...containing our sibling rings. They had arrived early and she kept it secret. I think I actually screamed. I remember shaking, I was so overwhelmed with emotion - I think the rest of the family were quite perplexed. It’s funny because I knew the ring was coming, I had co-designed it, but the emotion of the surprise and the feeling of being forever connected as a three absolutely blew me away.
The magic of gifts
Thinking back on some of these moments got me thinking about what makes a good gift, and the utter joy of the whole process, for both the gift giver and the lucky recipient. The magic when you can’t wait to give someone something, and then they are just as delighted as you hoped they would be. My mum could hardly contain herself getting the ‘Henry’ out of the car, and I will never forget my sister’s delight when I pretty much fell over at the surprise of the rings.
It’s not just the obvious ‘thought’ that counts - ‘what do they like?’, ‘what are their interests?’, ‘what are their favourite brands'?’; it’s more ‘what have they been saying?’, ‘what have I heard?’, ‘what really matters to them?’, and it’s certainly not about the size or cost (obviously).
My mum herself has always wanted to fly - not in a plane, but really fly, through the air like a bird. We talked a lot about her doing a parachute jump (she’s 82), and I haven’t yet found the solution, but one day...and what a day that will be.
What have been your most memorable gifts to give or receive and why?
Love and lemons 🍋
Em xx
First I must say, yay Henrys are the best!! Second - I love the idea of a sibling ring and what a beautiful way your sister surprised you with it. Third, I can’t think of my latest gift that really surprised me (it’s the summer holidays and my brain is currently a pile of mush) but I recently made my best friends collages of them when they were pregnant. I wanted to give them a memento of a time that was just theirs that everyone else will forget about. I made them cry - that wasn’t my goal but it felt nice that it had touched them so emotionally. X
Love this so much Emma, we had a Henry when I was younger, they are fabulous aren’t they? I think my favourite gifts are a necklace that my husband gave me on my wedding day and a soft toy dinosaur that my sister in law gave me, that sleeps in my bed!